Omens are building again. Little signs slowly appearing, in surprising places, just as they normally do. Apparently the Universe is in the mood for talking; I am grateful.
Things stalled for a while. I got distracted: focused too stronly on maintaining focus that I lost track on where I was going; of course, I ended up not going anywhere.
The end of Mars retrograde certainly helped. It was about that time that things started rolling again: I shook off my funk, took a look around, and noticed a large, draining hole in my life.
That recognition has mulling away in my mind now.
My husband said something profound that helped put things into perspective for me: "you're not supposed to be playing with a man who functions at the level of a six year old and changing a grown man's diapers, you're supposed to be playing with your six year old and changing your baby's diapers."
I like this line of work and I truly love some of the residents, but the job is becoming too draining and in becoming so emotionally invested into these people, I'm neglecting the most important people in my life.
Before this recognition, I was wondering why I was making no progress, why everything had come to a standstill. The Universe began whispering then. Little signs appearing, sporadically; I'm sure I missed most of them. But then the larger ones came. I laughed when "fireflies" made an appearance again: they were my omen of last year, the one I've still yet to decipher its meaning and relevence. This time, however, the meaning was clear.
So, now I wait. The change has been initiated and while I will be sad in parting with some of the wonderful people I have met, I take these steps away from them and toward my family's future.
Throwing the Bones